sleep in heavenly peace

Although this is a typical Kirsten sleeping position, I purposely took this picture because I needed a reminder of what it is to be at peace. I believe nothing says this better to me than looking at my sleeping girls, no matter what position they are in.

This weekend was a rough one.

Lots of fights, screams, tears, and then . . . the spitting.

The spitting led to the first ever mouth and soap combination in our house, on Sunday morning before church, of course. Nothing says preparing your heart for worship like a little soap in the mouth.

I'm not sure what I am doing wrong, or how to "fix" my girls. I really, truly am hoping that this passes, eventually. I'm not naive, I know my girls are sinful by nature, but really? What is this "mean girl" syndrome all about? Do I really have to read one of those horrible parenting books to figure this out?

So, on Sunday night, I visited their rooms, watched their quiet chests breathing up and down, gave them their nightly sleeping goodnight kiss, and whispered "I love you," because I do, with all my heart.

I signed

I signed.

the dotted line.

Did I really do that?

What does this mean for me and my family next year?

Change to me is scary, the thought of anything new brings me anxiety. In fact, if it is up to me, I will always live on Stanley Court because the change of a move would completely overwhelm me!

I knew I would have to sign the line either this year or next, it wasn't an option. God has been good, allowing me to work part time the past few years so I could spend some time with my girls while they were little. He has worked out childcare and finances. He has provided me colleagues and friends who "get it." He has opened a door for me during a very difficult transitional time in EC. He has helped Matt and I through some difficult times, and given us some really good times. God has been good.

I know that the future is not in my hands, as much as sometimes I would like it to be. Part of me is excited about the new experiences next year will bring. New curriculum. New students. New, yet familiar. The paycheck and not paying so much for benefits, will be huge for us. Tuition for the girls is going up, but that's okay, another commitment Matt and I have made, and have never had to really discuss. It doesn't matter what the future holds. Our girls will go to EC.

An incredibly wise friend of mine is always reminding me to live for God, and live "for me," not in a selfish way, but in the way God made me to be. Be content, Naomi. So as I signed, and I now consider what the implications of this signature mean for me for this summer, for next year, I will prayerfully and humbly thank God for this. I will do my best to be content and to use the gifts He has given me as a teacher, as a mom, as a friend, and as a wife in the year to come.

Hoping and praying this signature leads to balance, peace and contentment.